Physical symptoms such as fatigue, headaches, stomach pain, and an increased risk of heart disease are commonly experienced by those who undergo significant loss, which may not initially be associated with grief. While emotional challenges like anger, numbness, feeling on “autopilot,” and depression are expected after losing a loved one, it is essential to recognize that what may seem normal for one person could indicate deeper problems for another.
What could be considered typical for one individual might indicate more serious issues for someone else. Therefore, how can you determine when it is appropriate to seek help from a professional? According to Kenneth Doka, PhD, who serves as the senior vice president of grief programs at the Hospice Foundation of America, if you find yourself still struggling in important social roles or experiencing depression after some time has passed, it may be wise to consult a professional.
For many individuals, grief typically improves with time. However, if you are experiencing physical symptoms of grief, it is important to prioritize sleep, rest, hydration, regular meals, physical activity, and avoid alcohol and other substances that alter the mind, according to Doka. He suggests using the analogy of a roller coaster to understand that grieving involves going through ups and downs. If the low points become less frequent or shorter in duration, it is a positive indicator of progress. Doka, who is also a professor emeritus at the Graduate School of the College of New Rochelle in New York, emphasizes the importance of recognizing these signs of improvement in the grieving process.
M. Katherine Shear, MD, a professor of psychiatry and the founding director of the Center for Prolonged Grief at Columbia University School of Social Work in New York City, emphasizes that seeking medical help for grief that does not improve within approximately 6 months for adults or 1 year for children and teenagers is important because effective treatments are available. She states that these treatments are straightforward, short-term, and proven to be effective.
The experience of grief varies for individuals, and not everyone follows the same stages of grief. People may exhibit symptoms such as changes in sleep patterns, eating habits, memory lapses, or difficulty concentrating. If grief persists and does not improve, it could indicate prolonged grief disorder, where the grief becomes overwhelming and consumes a person’s life.
The circumstances surrounding a death, such as sudden or unexpected events like suicides, homicides, or accidents, can intensify the grief experience. Those suffering from prolonged grief may feel like they are going through the motions of life, constantly haunted by thoughts of the deceased. Practical implications of death, such as financial stress or losing connections with others, can also add to the emotional burden.
Additionally, grief can have physical manifestations, causing inflammation in the body and increasing the risk of various health issues. Grief can impact the immune system, leading to a higher susceptibility to infections and illnesses. The connection between the mind and body means that emotional reactions to loss can have physical effects on a person’s health.
